Deadpool 3 | 400 words about how it’s finished filming, to please the Google algorithm

Deadpool 3 resumes filming in the UK
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Deadpool 3 has finished filming, after it started filming again. But we need to beef the story up a bit to make Google happy.

Deadpool 3 has been shooting over the past few months, and now it’s wrapped production.

There’s little point me pretending that there’s any more to this particular story than that. The movie, starring Ryan Reynolds and Hugh Jackman, began production, then Hollywood strikes brought it to a stop, and then it started again, and now it’s stopped.

The problem, of course, is that summing this particular story up in under 50 words simply won’t do. It’s okay us making a thing of trying to be a website that doesn’t do clickbait, but the hard truth is we don’t hold the cards here. It’s Google. Visitors to a website are primarily driven by Google’s search engine, and because we don’t have money to chuck at that particular corporate machine, we can’t even pay for one of those sponsored spots that help get you onto page one of Google’s search results.

Instead, websites such as this are expected to play the Google game.

Google has algorithms as to what it determines ‘quality content’, and part of that is that even if a story can be told in 50 words, you have to try to get the word count up. The absolute bare minimum? 300 words or so, and even then, that’s seen as shallow, and people who can turn a 20 word story into 600 words – ideally with lots of Deadpool 3 keywords Deadpool 3 – are more likely to Deadpool 3 rise through the Deadpool 3 search rankings.

Google, like a sinister relative who reads you scary bedtime stories, has a malevolent presence in our life. It’s the babysitter we can’t do without if we want to stay in business, but the fodder that it most prefers to feast on is bullshit. We must thus provide verbose bullshit to the machine, so that the machine can temporarily grant us favour.

That’s why this simple story about Deadpool 3 finishing filming, that I summed up in 15 words in the first paragraph of this article, has now been inflated to 400 words. If we do this with every story we ever write, then we might stand at least a fighting chance against AI-stuffed news reporting bilge machines. But we wouldn’t bet on it.

Deadpool 3, incidentally, has now finished filming. It’s out on 26th July 2024. Thanks, Google.

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