With Wake Up Dead Man castings coming thick and fast, we’ve got a handy guide to who’s not in the Knives Out 3 cast so far.
Since Knives Out 3 was officially announced (and renamed Wake Up Dead Man) last week, the casting news has been flying thick and fast. Josh O’Connor, Cailee Spaeny, Andrew Scott and Kerry Washington were first out of the bag, with Glenn Close following up close behind.
That’s five whole names! In one week! Far too many, if you ask us. With that in mind, here’s everyone NOT cast in the third Knives Out Mystery (so far). Feel free to comment below if we’ve missed anyone.
Daniel Day-Lewis
If there’s one thing that could pull the famously retired actor out of, well, retirement, surely it would be a new Knives Out? We’re not actors, but even we’d bite your arm off to stand in a library and snarl at a Kentucky-adjacent detective for a few weeks. As a special twist, Benoit Blanc could turn out to be a complete Day-Lewis method acting creation all along.
The Muppets
Alas, with the announcements so far, the internet’s dream of a muppet-ised Knives Out with Daniel Craig at the centre looks increasingly unlikely. Still, never say never: we’re sure Andrew Scott could make a very convincing Oscar The Grouch. He’s very versatile.
Hugh Grant (or is he?)
Hollywood’s go-to curmudgeon might be swimming in small, orange-hued offers following his turn in last year’s Wonka, but hopefully he can spare a bit of time to reprise his role as Benoit Blanc’s sourdough-prepping partner, Philip. Bonus points if he turns out to be the murderer.
Isambard Kingdom Brunel
What better way to capture the promise of the title than by restoring life to an actual dead man? Any Victorian-era gentleman would do, really, we just think a mutton-chopped murderer would really suit the Knives Out vibe.
Meryl Streep
Listen, Rian. If you want our advice (and we’re assuming you do), you can rarely go wrong with a bit of Meryl. Have you seen The Devil Wears Prada? She’s great! She’s in Only Murders In The Building, too, so she clearly likes the genre at least a little bit. Go on, you know you want to.
Taylor Swift
Look, keeping the virtual lights on is no easy task, and even we need to engage in a bit of SEO-wrangling from time to time. Enter “most Googled person of 2023”, Taylor Swift. We’ve heard that if we fill this paragraph with things like “Is Taylor Swift in the new Knives Out movie?”, “Taylor Swift Knives Out rumours” and “Who is going out with Taylor Swift new Knives Out movie” then the internet will give us a lovely treat. If we can start a completely fabricated rumour that “Taylor Swift cast in new Knives Out movie, Knives Out 3” then even better.
Read more: Movie titles | The challenge of getting a film’s name right
78 Conservative MPs
There’s a general election coming up in the UK, and with plenty of MPs from all parties (mostly Tories) stepping down before the summer is out, that’s a lot of reasonably high-profile public figures twiddling their thumbs and looking for a job. Matt Hancock seemed to make quite the impression on I’m A Celebrity, and there’s no reason former thespian Michael Gove couldn’t pull off something similar on the big screen. At the very least, he’d have to make a better actor than he did Education Secretary (aha! Satire!).
Chris Pratt (voice only)
Rolling in dough after some (presumably) lucrative roles in The Super Mario Bros Movie and The Garfield Movie, it’s only a matter of time before Chris Pratt grows tired of corporate gigs and joins The Knives Out 3 Movie. He could play an animated character in some poison-induced hallucination sequence, or he could dub over Josh O’Connor like Glenn Close did with Andie MacDowell that one time.
Bono
We hear that getting music rights for a film is a pain in the arse. It’s feasible, then, that Johnson could have promised the U2 frontman a cameo in exchange for stealing his song title. He could follow Daniel Craig around singing I Still Haven’t Found What I’m Looking For until, inevitably, he does.
Hercule Poirot
Don’t be ridiculous, he’s a fictional character. Take this seriously, please.
Clifford (The Big Red Dog)
Inspired by the master of mystery himself and with a distinctly spooky looking announcement trailer, perhaps Johnson has been inspired by Sherlock Holmes’ most famous case: The Hound Of The Baskervilles. The only thing that could make Conan-Doyle’s ferocious mutt more terrifying is if he was the size of a small van. And red.
Read more: How do dogs feel about The Garfield Movie?
Piltdown Man
Every murder mystery needs its corpse, and what better star to lie un-breathing upon the boards than the most famous early human fossil in scientific history? The fact the whole thing was a fraud could make for a lovely twist, too. It’s all very meta, and therefore clever.
Basil, The Great Mouse Detective
Theseries might already have a rather famous detective at the helm but, as Knives Out and Glass Onion proved, Benoit Blanc is at his best when he has a partner to bounce his musings off. For a natty twist on the formula, why not throw another sleuth into the mix? It could be like a buddy-cop thing, or Basil could control Benoit from under a deerstalker like Ratatouille.
Wake Up Dead Man: A Knives Out Mystery is scheduled for release in 2025.
