Mel Gibson, Sylvester Stallone, Jon Voight to be Donald Trump’s ambassadors in Hollywood

Holbein The Ambassadors
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Donald Trump appoints Sylvester Stallone, Mel Gibson and Jon Voight as his Hollywood ambassadors. Nothing could go wrong.


America has a bit of a week ahead of it next week, and as keen as this site is to avoid politics where possible, sometimes it stares you straight in the face. Convict and sex pest Donald Trump is set to re-assume the presidency of the United States, and he’s got his eye on Hollywood this time around.

Keen to make sure that Hollywood bends to his will, Donald Trump has now appointed three special ambassadors to Hollywood. The names? Mel Gibson, Sylvester Stallone and Jon Voight.

Trump has posted that these three will be his “eyes and ears”, adding that “I will get done what they suggest. It will again be, like the United States of America itself, The Golden Age of Hollywood!”

It’s important, clearly, to recapture the days when you could go on an anti-semitic rant without consequence, where you characterise your opponents as “Satan”, and where you make Stop! Or My Mom Will Shoot.

I’m genuinely fascinated to see what the three of them come up with. Judging by his own social media posts, Mel Gibson was just as surprised as anyone, suggesting that he wasn’t forewarned of the news or the announcement. “Nevertheless, I heed the call. My duty as a citizen is to give any help and insight I can,” he added.

It’s unknown if anyone else was on the shortlist as Trump looks to influence the future of Hollywood, but surely Brett Ratner’s agent is making a few phone calls this morning.

Trump has described Hollywood as a “great but very troubled place”, and there can be no three finer choices to bring harmony back than Mel Gibson, Jon Voight and Sylvester Stallone.

This plan will surely go perfectly well.

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